:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
Randomize
