The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
Randomize
