You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Randomize
