Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Randomize
