girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
Randomize
