I cockslap morals
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
the liver wants what the liver wants
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
Randomize
