im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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