My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
