is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
