i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
