The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
Panties = found
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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