RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize
