tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
I have post one night stand depression
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