i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Randomize