I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Randomize
