I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Randomize
