Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
Randomize
