Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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