I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
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