Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
She just used a chaser for red wine.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
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