just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Randomize
