I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
Little spoons don't ask big questions
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
I see more hoeing in ur future
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