So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
