I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Randomize