hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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