Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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