Kiss
Puke
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
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