is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
