He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
