is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
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