Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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