Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Randomize
