what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
