Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Holy shit dude........stairs
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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