So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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