I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
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