she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Randomize