as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
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