The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
Holy shit dude........stairs
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
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