why didn't you poke me back
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Randomize
