How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
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