SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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