She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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