i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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