I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Randomize
