No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Randomize
