was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
P.S. I can't hear my feet
I am full of burrito and curiosity
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
Randomize
