I'm going to jail i love you
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
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