I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Randomize
