she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Randomize
